A young college student in the Philippines finds herself in a complicated emotional and ethical situation after developing feelings for her professor, who is already in a committed relationship. The student, using the pseudonym 'Leni', reached out to the advice column SunStar Tambagi ko Noy Kulas on December 29, 2025, seeking guidance on how to handle her predicament.
The Confession of a Troubled Student
Leni, a 23-year-old single college student, explains that her problems began when she developed romantic feelings for someone she acknowledges is inappropriate. The object of her affection is her college professor, a man in his early thirties who is new to their school. She describes him as handsome, intelligent, and kind. However, the major complication is that he already has a live-in partner and a child with her.
The situation escalated after Leni was elected as a class officer. Her professor began asking for her help with tasks he couldn't manage alone, leading to them spending more time together. Occasionally, he would treat her to meals outside of school. During these outings, he confided in her, revealing that he is unhappy in his current relationship because he has caught his partner cheating on him twice. He stated he forgave her solely for the sake of their child.
A Boundary Crossed and a Plea for Help
As they grew closer, the professor confessed to having feelings for Leni. While she was surprised and secretly happy, she demonstrated strong ethical judgment by immediately telling him that a relationship would be inappropriate. She emphasized the problematic nature of their potential connection, given he is her teacher, and even simple outings like sharing a meal would be viewed negatively. Leni did not admit that her feelings were mutual. Her letter concludes with a heartfelt plea: "Unsay maayo nakong buhaton? Please tambagi ko." (What should I do? Please advise me.)
Noy Kulas's Firm and Wise Counsel
In his response, Noy Kulas commends Leni for her correct initial reaction. He strongly agrees that a romantic relationship between them is ethically wrong and would look bad to others. He labels it a teacher-student relationship that is ethically unacceptable.
Noy Kulas advises Leni to tell her professor that they must avoid each other completely. He warns that if someone were to complain about them to the school administration, it could ruin both of their reputations and academic standing. Furthermore, he cautions Leni against entering into a relationship with a man who is already entangled in serious problems with his partner. She could easily become involved in their conflicts, which would negatively affect her studies.
The final piece of advice is clear and decisive: "Sultihi siya nga samtang sayo pa mas maayong magpalay-anay na lang mo." (Tell him that since it's still early, it's better for you to just avoid each other.) Noy Klas urges her to prevent any damaging events before they happen, protecting both individuals from severe consequences.
