Dear Noy Kulas,
Just call me Mirasol, 30 years old, single. My problem is about forbidden love. I have a boyfriend, let's call him Joel, 31 years old, single. He used to work at a call center but got fired after testing positive for illegal drugs. When we first met six years ago, he wasn't an addict. He was doing well back then. The problem started after his parents separated. He began drinking heavily and eventually I found out he was using illegal drugs. He didn't lie to me about it, saying it was his way of coping with his parents' breakup. I have been gently urging him to quit because it's not a healthy coping mechanism. But he claims it's temporary, knowing it's wrong. However, he said that back in January 2025, and his habits remain the same: he drinks and uses drugs. What should I do to make him stop? My parents want me to leave him while it's still early. Are they right? Please advise, Noy Kulas.
MIRASOL
Mirasol,
Don't just break up with him right away, as it might worsen his low self-esteem. Instead, encourage him to enter a rehab center where he can receive counseling sessions tailored to his situation. He needs extra patience and understanding from you. Keep reminding him about the importance of life and help him accept events beyond his control. Even if a couple has been together for a long time, it's not a guarantee they'll stay together forever. Instead of ruining his life, he should straighten it out and stand on his own. He shouldn't waste his life dwelling on his parents' marriage. Whatever happened in their marriage should not drag him down. If he is using this to guilt-trip his parents, that's wrong. He is no longer a child and should not act childishly in his reactions.
NOY KULAS
