A 32-year-old single man from the Philippines has turned to the popular advice column "Tambagi ko Noy Kulas" with a complex romantic dilemma that pits his heart against family loyalty. The case, published on January 19, 2026, highlights the emotional turmoil that can arise from long-distance relationships and unexpected connections.
The Heart of the Dilemma: From Loneliness to Love
The letter writer, who identifies himself as Doody, detailed his three-year relationship with his girlfriend, referred to as Ainee. He described Ainee as having a strong personality, which initially made him hesitant. Their relationship faced a significant test when Ainee moved abroad for work early last year. As time passed, their communication became less frequent due to her busy schedule.
Feeling lonely, Doody found solace in the company of Ainee's younger sister, Sheila, whom he described as her complete opposite. Their frequent communication and outings led to the development of mutual romantic feelings. Six months ago, Sheila broke up with her own boyfriend after realizing her feelings for Doody, stating she was ready to face her older sister's reaction.
The situation escalated physically, and Doody assured Sheila he was ready to take responsibility if she became pregnant. His central question to the columnist was a painful one: "What should I do about her older sister? Should I break up with her?"
Noy Kulas's Direct Advice: Honesty and Preparation
In his response, Noy Kulas did not mince words. He advised Doody to have an honest conversation with his girlfriend, Ainee, if he no longer has love for her. He emphasized that the breakup should not be done via email but through a direct online conversation. The columnist pointed out that Ainee might also have lost feelings or found someone else, contributing to the lack of communication.
Noy Kulas highlighted a key factor in the breakdown: "Proximity (closeness and distance) plays a very big role in a relationship. The length of a relationship is no guarantee that you are meant to be." He suggested that Ainee's family has likely already noticed the closeness between Doody and Sheila.
Navigating the Family Fallout
The advice extended beyond the immediate breakup. Noy Kulas instructed Doody to explain the situation to Ainee's family after ending the relationship with the older sister. He must clarify why he fell in love with the younger sister and express his readiness to marry her.
The columnist posed a crucial question for introspection: "Have you truly weighed carefully that the younger sister is the one you love?" He warned Doody and Sheila to prepare for any response from the family. Most importantly, he stressed that all these discussions—with Ainee, Sheila, and the family—must happen before any action is taken, and a concrete plan for "what's next" must be in place.
This case underscores the profound challenges of maintaining long-distance relationships and the complicated emotional and familial consequences that can arise when new bonds form close to home. The advice centers on confronting the truth with courage and preparing for the inevitable repercussions within the family unit.
