Dear Noy Kulas,
My parents have always wanted me to marry a foreigner because they think Filipino men are worthless. They have been telling me this since I was young. Now I am 34 years old. Please hide my name as Loise.
I work as a supervisor in a company here in Cebu. I became close to a co-worker who is an ordinary employee because he is kind and hardworking. He is two years younger than me. I have felt a strong connection with him since we met. He is smart, and I think he deserves a better job. But he says he is okay with our company because he supports his siblings, as his parents rely on him.
Because of our closeness, we developed a relationship without our colleagues knowing. We told them we were just friends. But my father saw us together after church. He was very angry and confronted my boyfriend. After that, my boyfriend was absent from work for a week due to shame.
He stopped talking to me, and I learned that he applied for another company and was accepted. He tendered his resignation. I was deeply hurt, and it worsened because until now, he hasn't spoken to me. He ignores my calls. What should I do, Noy Kulas?
LOISE
Loise,
If you have already exhausted your efforts to communicate with him, do not force him. He might be deeply hurt by what happened, especially by your father's insults. His ego was wounded, particularly if he is a sensitive person. It is difficult when that is touched because it can overpower love, especially if the incident is recent.
Wait for him to reach out to you. When things calm down and his true feelings for you sink in, he will communicate. But if his feelings for you are shallow, he will not communicate because his pride takes precedence over love. It is better that this happened because you have seen his weakness. He does not deserve your love.
NOY KULAS
