A 47-year-old Filipino man, identifying himself only as Henry, has written to the popular advice column "Tambagi ko Noy Kulas" detailing a marital crisis stemming from a significant age gap with his wife, which has now escalated to threats of legal action.
A Marriage Tested by Time and Changing Bodies
Henry, who is now 47, married his wife when he was just 23 years old. His wife was already in her 30s at the time, creating a substantial age difference. He recalls that his family questioned his decision due to the gap, but he was captivated by her beauty and fit physique, as she was an avid gym-goer.
The problems began when his wife reached her 50s. Her lifestyle and body changed as she lost interest in the gym, preferring to go out and eat frequently. Henry laments that their intimate moments have dwindled to just twice a year. Despite his repeated attempts to discuss her physical changes, she dismisses him, even telling him to find someone else if he is unhappy.
Reconnection and Discovery
Feeling neglected, Henry recently met his ex-girlfriend from college, who had recently become a widow. They reminisced about the past and rekindled their connection. However, their secret did not remain hidden for long.
Henry's wife discovered the affair. She confronted the ex-girlfriend and subsequently threw Henry out of their home, ordering him to go live with his ex. Although Henry left, he clarifies that he did not move in with his former girlfriend and is currently staying at their family home. His wife is now threatening to file a case against both Henry and his ex.
Noy Kulas Weighs In: Advice and a Warning
In his response published on January 12, 2026, the columnist Noy Kulas addressed Henry's predicament. He pointed out that while it is easy to threaten a lawsuit, proving the allegations in court is difficult, noting a perceived bias in the law that makes convicting a man for adultery challenging.
However, Noy Kulas did not condone Henry's actions. He strongly criticized Henry for seeking another woman simply because his wife had aged and gained weight. He reminded Henry that he was warned about his wife becoming a senior citizen long before he would.
The core advice was clear: Henry should have communicated his marital grievances to his wife instead of looking for a replacement. Noy Kulas clarified that his wife's angry statement telling him to find someone else was not permission to commit adultery.
He advised Henry not to further provoke his wife's anger and recommended that both parties seek marriage counseling. This would allow his wife to receive guidance on her own mistakes and remind her that she still has marital obligations to Henry, despite being a senior citizen. The solution, according to Noy Kulas, is for both to find a way to work through their issues together.
