Dear Papa Joe,
I will use the alias Cruise. My story is that I am married, but we have been separated for several years. The annulment process is taking too long, so I hope divorce becomes legal so I can be free. The issue is that it is inevitable to develop feelings for someone. It happened to me—I have a crush on someone, but I cannot speak up because it is forbidden and complicated if I give in to my feelings. However, no matter what, there comes a point when your feelings intensify, and I want to tell her, but because of the aforementioned issues, I cannot, and I am also afraid of rejection. Since I am very bothered, I decided to leave my job and transfer elsewhere to forget her. Fortunately, I found a remote job with minimal face-to-face interaction, as I only need to report on-site when necessary. The downside is that I still think of her, and I must say that I was in a better emotional state when I could still see her. I only have two choices: follow my head or my heart. But right now, it feels like I want to follow my heart. What is your take?
Papa Joe's Response
Cruise, you should tell her. It will help, whether she accepts you or not. Because if she doesn't, it will help you accept the reality that you two cannot be together. If you do tell her, it is better to give a disclaimer first about your situation and that you are still in the process of annulment. Even if you do it in a lighthearted way, you have expressed your feelings to her. Who knows, she might accept you. The more you strive to process the annulment, the more it becomes worth the wait.
