Wife Seeks Guidance After Emotional Confrontation Over Husband's Affair
A 38-year-old woman from Cebu, who wishes to remain anonymous and goes by the name Magda, has reached out for advice following a tumultuous discovery about her husband's infidelity. Magda, who is separated from her husband and has one child, reveals that her spouse moved to Manila for work after being hired by a company there. He would return home to Cebu only once a month, staying for just three days at a time.
The Discovery and Confrontation
Magda initially believed their arrangement was working well, as it provided a stable, higher income for their family, and her husband had no housing expenses since he lived with his sibling in Manila. However, her world turned upside down when she discovered that her husband had rekindled a relationship with his high school sweetheart, who is also based in Manila. "What wife wouldn't be angry about what happened?" Magda writes, describing intense arguments during his last visit home, after which he stopped returning and only sent the usual financial support.
Despite having her own regular job and small sidelines, Magda's anger led her to travel to Manila, where she confronted the couple. She found them living together in a rented apartment, with the other woman pregnant. In a fit of rage, Magda physically attacked the woman, but her husband intervened, and instead of supporting her, his family turned against Magda for her actions. She returned to Cebu feeling blamed, questioning her own role: "I am the wife, not the mistress. Am I the one who is wrong?"
Expert Advice on Moving Forward
In response, advice columnist Noy Kulas acknowledges that while Magda's reaction was understandable, it was not entirely correct. "Even though what you did was wrong, your reaction is very understandable because you were deceived. You were the one who was wronged," he notes, pointing out that most spouses would seek revenge in such situations. He emphasizes that Magda should not blame herself, as she acted out of her role as a wife, and she should not be swayed by her husband's family's criticism, calling it a natural response.
Noy Kulas advises Magda to take time to process her emotions before making any decisions. "Weigh whether you will file a case against your husband and the mistress. That is your right under our law. For now, don't do anything yet because you are still emotional. Let everything sink in first before you decide and make your next move," he concludes, offering a path forward for legal and emotional resolution.
