The Journey Away from Home: A Filipino's Baptism of Fire
During my college years, I faced the difficult decision to leave my hometown for the bustling metropolis. This move meant distancing myself from family and familiar surroundings, marking what I consider my baptism of fire. For many Filipinos, this experience represents a bittersweet taste of freedom—often viewed as temporary, with the expectation to return home after graduation. However, I chose a different path, refusing to surrender that hard-won liberty.
The Pull of Home: When Homesickness Dictates Destiny
I recall my dorm mates from the provinces, particularly one we called Mikky, who struggled intensely with homesickness. She would weep late into the night, missing her parents deeply, until she eventually boarded a flight home. With a resigned "Que será, será", she made a long-term decision driven by emotion. While returning home may have offered immediate comfort, it likely sidelined the ambitious future plans she once harbored.
A World of Contrast: The Philippines vs. Global Pace
Traveling abroad in my early twenties exposed me to societies where people moved with vitality and purpose. In stark contrast, the Philippines often feels like a lethargic slacker—constantly in motion but lacking clear direction. Our country is a tempting paradise, yet succumbing to its allure can trap dreams in slumber, only to be harshly awakened by reality.
Fresh Perspectives: The Value of Living Away
Observing other nations allowed me to reevaluate my own with newfound clarity. For those who are single or without children, living away from home can serve as a powerful reset. Solitude provides space for self-reflection and mental recalibration, challenging accepted norms. This process of refinement is crucial, producing personal gold that ultimately enriches the national reserve.
Breaking Taboos: The Cost of Staying Tethered
The idea of breaking away remains taboo in Filipino society, often deemed unreasonable. Yet, consider the consequences when citizens remain anchored to their nests—does progress occur? A ship cannot sail while weighed down, just as humans cannot advance when chained by dependency.
Cultural Enablers: The Cycle of Dysfunctional Attachments
Our culture sometimes fosters a grotesque enabling attitude, encouraging parasitic attachments and irresponsible lifestyles within families. This creates toxic chains that violate personal boundaries in an already invasive society. Poverty is not merely incidental; it is perpetuated by these dynamics.
Ambition vs. Obligation: The Filipino Mentality
In the Filipino psyche, where ambition should thrive, we often find meager goals centered on pleasing others or repaying moral debts. Passed down through generations, this mentality is often labeled as love, but I view it as dysfunctional.
Wealth and Dependency: The Filipino Economic Landscape
Among Forbes Philippines' 50 Richest, only a minority are categorically self-made. Most owe their status to inherited colonial Spanish land or membership in Fil-Chinese business dynasties. This highlights a troubling reality: fewer Filipinos build wealth from scratch, not due to lack of capability, but because dependency imprisons potential builders.
Global Lessons: Resources vs. Resilience
Nations with fewer natural resources have surpassed us in development. Is our lag due to geographic curses or lack of oil? Venezuela, rich in oil, requires rescue. Corruption alone does not explain it either, as many wealthy nations also grapple with corrupt officials. The difference lies in a core strength: a robust sense of independence among the people.
The Core Issue: Destructive Dependency
Our core is marred by destructive dependency, keeping us buried in national debt and sustaining systemic dead weight. This interdependence makes us vulnerable to external disturbances, leading us to blame the government for struggles, despite living in a democratic system.
A Cycle of Suppression: The National Mirror
Stepping back reveals a bigger picture: our country's state mirrors the suppressed drive of its people. This cycle is unconsciously perpetuated, yet hope remains. Powerful nations demonstrate that healthy individualism, where each person takes responsibility, propels national movement forward.
The True National Reserve: Dreams and Fire
I believe the real national reserve lies in the intangible dreams and inner fire waiting to move the needle. For some, these dreams are blueprints for empires yet to be built. The tragedy is when this fire is subdued by burdens not our own, sinking aspirations to the ocean floor.
A Call to Action: Breaking the Cycle with Compassion
I write for three reasons: we remain stuck, there is hope, and we can break free. Let me be clear—this is not about cruelly cutting off those who depend on us. Instead, it urges clearer vision and informed decisions. Hold the hands of previous generations, who were victims themselves, but avoid passing this dependency to offspring.
Our Generation's Role: Lighting Fires, Not Cultivating Dependency
Our generation can lead a paradigm shift. Take comfort that this sacrifice improves lives beyond our immediate bubble. To those raising children in this era: never cultivate dependency; light their fire instead. Breaking this cycle may be the greatest gift to your children and country. Cut the cord, establish your core, and build. Only then will you see your empire rise before the fire dies.
